Making friends in your 20s with Hey! VINA

I’m currently in my early 20s, an age where making friends isn’t as simple as it used to be. It’s been a while since I left full-time education and during those years friendships came from things as simple as sitting next to each other in form class every morning.

I’ve changed a whole lot since my school days and although I’ve met new people over the past few years none of those relationships have really blossomed into long-term friendships.

It was just a couple of months into 2018 when I heard about an app for women to make friends called Hey! VINA. The premise of the app was that it was like tinder but for women.

As making new friends hadn’t been easy over the years I decided to give the app a go and see what it was like. A few days later I downloaded the app and set up a profile.

The app in general was easy to use and when it came to setting up a profile aside from adding a picture the rest was optional. You could personalise your bio, add your place of study or occupation and answer questions and do quizzes to help the person viewing your profile get to know you better. I found the bio a little challenging to write but ended up just putting my interests/things i do in my spare time.

Hey! VINA works by swiping right if you’re interested and left if not. If you match you get a notification and then it’s up to either person to start a conversation.

The first day I got the app I wasn’t too keen on it but by day 2 I was happily swiping to my hearts content and ended up having to extend my radius because I’d quickly swiped through all the profiles of people close to me.

From the time I spent using Hey! VINA there were 2 people I moved from messaging on the app to exchanging numbers with. However, neither of these people lived in my city so we couldn’t just meet for a quick coffee after work.

The first person was lovely, friendly and easy to talk to. From the beginning I could tell that she was genuinely looking to meet new friends and she really seemed like someone I could see myself becoming friends with.

However, after a month or so the conversation died out. The fact that we’d never met up and didn’t live in the same city as me made it easy to conclude that this potential friendship was not meant to be.

The second was quite similar, we seemed to have lots in common and she was easy to talk to. However, it became clear that she had a lot of things going on in her personal life and even though I could relate, I didn’t feel comfortable with the way things were going  as we’d never even met.

Shortly after we had a disagreement and she showed me that she was not the kind of person that I wanted to have in my life.

Based on my time on Hey! VINA, I’ve complied some pros and cons below.

Pros

  • It’s an easy way to try and meet new friends.
  • You come across people you may have otherwise never met.
  • It reminds you that you aren’t alone in wanting to make new friends.

Cons

  • You’re judging possible friends based on looks and a short bio so there’s a chance you’ll end up swiping left for someone you’d have gotten along with if you met them face to face first.
  • Not everyone will make the effort which can get frustrating.

In the end, I deleted the app. It just wasn’t working for me and I’d ran out of people within 10-15 miles of my city. Most of the conversations I had ended as we ran out of things to say and didn’t get to the point of arranging to meet up.

Even though I didn’t have the best experience with Hey! VINA I’m glad I tried it out. It helped me think more about the kinds of people I’d want as friends and I think it’s worth trying out, even if it’s just for a couple of weeks.

The advice I’d give for using the app would be once you start chatting with someone and you feel like you get along well enough suggest meeting up. That way you can see what they’re like in person and decide if you want to continue getting to know them instead of just spending weeks or months messaging back and forth.

Overall, I think the concept of an app for making friends is a great idea and aside from Hey! VINA there are loads more out there. I also want to add that there are loads of other ways outside of friendship apps to meet new people as you get older.

Do you find it easy making friends as an adult?

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